The Only Things You Can Truly Control (and Why That's Empowering)
We often feel overwhelmed by life's unpredictability, but the truth is, we only truly control two things: our actions and our reactions. Focusing on these empowers us. "Actions" are our choices and behaviors, while "reactions" are our responses to events, including our thoughts and feelings. By consciously choosing our actions and reactions it allows us to navigate life's challenges with greater confidence and peace.
2/7/20253 min read
We live in a world that often feels chaotic and unpredictable. From global events to daily disappointments, life throws curveballs our way constantly. It's easy to feel overwhelmed, stressed, and even helpless when things don't go according to plan. We might wish we could control the weather, the economy, or other people's choices. But the truth is, we can't. Trying to control the uncontrollable is a recipe for frustration and anxiety.
So, where does our power lie? It's a surprisingly simple, yet profoundly powerful concept: we only have control over two things – our actions and our reactions.
Think about it. Isaiah 54:17 promises that no weapon formed against us will prosper. It never promises that weapons won't form. We can't stop a storm from brewing, but we can choose to prepare for it. We can't force someone to change their mind, but we can choose how we respond to their disagreement. We can't prevent bad things from happening, but we can choose how we navigate the aftermath.
This realization, while seemingly limiting, is actually incredibly liberating. It shifts our focus from what we can't change to what we can. Instead of wasting energy wishing things were different, we can channel that energy into making conscious choices about how we act and react to the world around us.
Breaking it Down:
Actions: These are the things we do. They encompass our choices, behaviors, and efforts. We can control whether we go to work, how we treat others, what we say, and the steps we take towards our goals. Taking ownership of our actions means being accountable for our choices and striving to align them with our values.
Reactions: These are our responses to external events. They include our thoughts, feelings, and how we choose to express them. We can't always control our initial emotional response (feeling sad when we receive bad news, for example), but we can control how we process those emotions and how we ultimately react. Do we lash out in anger? Do we retreat into despair? Or do we take a breath, assess the situation, and choose a more constructive response?
Why This Matters:
Focusing on our actions and reactions empowers us in several ways:
Reduced Stress: When we stop trying to control the uncontrollable, we free ourselves from a lot of unnecessary stress and worry.
Increased Self-Efficacy: Taking ownership of our choices and responses strengthens our sense of self-efficacy – the belief in our ability to influence outcomes.
Improved Relationships: By choosing thoughtful actions and reactions, we can foster healthier and more fulfilling relationships.
Greater Resilience: When we understand that we can navigate challenges by controlling our responses, we become more resilient in the face of adversity.
Putting it into Practice:
This isn't always easy. It takes conscious effort and practice to shift our mindset. Here are a few tips:
Pause and Breathe: Before reacting to a situation, take a moment to pause and breathe. This allows you to create space between the event and your reaction.
Observe Your Thoughts and Feelings: Pay attention to your internal experience without judgment. Acknowledge your emotions without letting them dictate your behavior.
Pray for Wisdom and Guidance: Consider the consequences of your potential reactions and choose the one that aligns best with your values and goals.
Focus on What You Can Control: When faced with a challenging situation, ask yourself: "What actions can I take? How can I choose to respond?"
The next time you feel overwhelmed by the chaos of life, remember that you have more power than you think. By focusing on the only two things you can truly control – your actions and your reactions – you can navigate any storm with greater confidence and peace. It's a simple concept, but it's a game-changer.